Delaware 100

September 19-20, 2009

Newark, Delaware

By Dave Bursler

I lived this past year as most in these times have, building relationships, caring for my family and fighting desperately for my job. I found my place in life in a home where I’m surrounded by loving people who provide challenges outside those which I’ve been faced with before. I am happier now than I have ever been with a beautiful wife and two young step children by my side. I welcome the new challenges that I’m certain to experience and want to share with those whom I love the challenges that I’ve already conquered.

My wife, Angela, has read my stories and tries to understand why but as I’ve explained to her, if it is not in your heart you will never fully understand. It is not a cult or a way of life but instead it is part of a person’s soul. It is an individual sport yet those who participate connect and bond as they battle a common foe. The foe is not the person behind you or in front of you but instead it is your own mind. The questions start at mile one, “can I do it”, “did I train hard enough”, “will my body break down” and on and on they go, sucking precious energy from your body. How a person reacts to these battles determines the outcome of his or her run. They can be fierce battles that test your ability to make correct decisions about your body while keeping your mind in check. There are strategies which I personally incorporate to ensure success, mind games that I truly enjoy. I do it because I can and to prove to others that if they have a desire they to can do it as well. I am not superhuman, I have no particular outstanding skills or abilities just a burning desire to accomplish a goal.

In late June I secretly made a decision to run one last one hundred mile run in Delaware on September 19^th. This decision was certainly influenced by my feelings of bliss as I tracked the progression of the Western States 100 however my main motive for running was to share my old passion with my new family.

The number one reason I decided to run one more race was to expose my two young step boys to individual runners who would demonstrate grit, tenacity, athleticism and good sportsmanship. I’m disappointed in the exposure they receive on television from pro and even college athletes who give up because they’re losing or can’t play because they bruised their toe or do not give it their all because their sport is not what is most important.

I started the quest for my third Delaware 100 finish by running a solo thirty five mile run in White Clay Creek State Park on July 2nd. I retraced the steps of the competitors of the HUMP Run 50K which was held at the end of May and is sponsored by the “Traildawgs” running group. It was during this first long run that I developed a sketchy training plan that I had hoped would leave me prepared for my final hundred miler in September.

Family obligations and pain from injuries incurred long ago left me limited to running at best every other day. I supplemented the running with one hour strength training sessions on the off days which, if nothing else, left me feeling strong throughout my entire body. My plan included an attempt at fifty miles around the Schuylkill River Loop at the end of July, one more HUMP Run reproduction in August and another attempt at fifty miles in early September. Well I took it one day and a time and ultimately failed at my fifty mile attempt having only completed thirty five miles and then successfully completing a second HUMP Run in August only to miss out completely on that final planned fifty miler in early September. Averaging twenty to twenty five miles a week my training at best was minimal. I’ve always said to myself that anybody can do it. Well now I was anybody and it was time to prove my belief.

I promised my wife, Angela, that I would never let my running interfere with family activities or the time that I spent with her. In fact I did my best to hold true to that promise but as I have learned over time what one might perceive to be true might not be the other’s perception. I did what I thought was my best to satisfy that last burning desire in my heart while still being there for my wife and step kids. Angela made her feelings known early on in our relationship that she was not a proponent of ultra distance running but that she supported my desire to run conservatively. Though she approved of my running short distances there were still times when I know deep down she felt left out. I certainly felt conflicted and upset myself because I wanted my cake and be able to eat it too. We were either going to allow this to strain our relationship or we were going to find a way to grow. We’re strong people and we have and will continue to grow from this experience and all others that follow in its path.

Through August I continued, secretly, to prepare myself to run in the Delaware 100 but the secret was revealed after my final HUMP Run reproduction. I didn’t tell Angela, I didn’t have to tell her. The scrapes on my legs that I got while bushwhacking the final HUMP section told the story. When questioned about the scrapes I had to come clean and tell her that I ran the entire day instead of attending a meeting at work as I had told her. Yep, she caught me in a lie. While I certainly can not justify my lie I will say that I only did it so she wouldn’t be mad at me for running. Any how this revelation led her to dig further and her research revealed my name on the Delaware 100 entrants list. It was out, it was in the open but still I didn’t sit down with her to discuss how she felt. Instead I waited and waited and waited some more until finally one month before the race I brought it to the attention of the entire family. I always felt that it would be important to allow the entire family to have input on my decision because I know that they would have my best interest at heart. I didn’t come straight out and ask them but instead I held a poll with a secret question which was would it be okay if I ran in a one hundred mile race. The outcome………..two to one in favor of me running the race.

The race that was on now was for me to get my head on straight and decide for myself what would be best for me. The closer the day of the race the more hesitant that I became. My mind was telling me that I couldn’t do it but my heart said give it a go. I couldn’t allow a simple fear of failure to be the reason for not attempting the long run. What type of roll model would I be then? I knew it would be a game time decision but I also knew that I would stand up to the plate and give it a go.

The week of the race was a bit stressful as our family experienced growing pains adjusting to our still new environment. Change is difficult and responding to the needs of those who have been given the expectation to accept change can be difficult too. Our family battled through a week of change that left wounds that will one day lead to a stronger relationship and understanding amongst us all. Going into a long run emotionally battered myself was a first for me but I had to follow through with my plans.

The night before the run I stopped by the race director’s house to acknowledge the fact that I would be running the following day. Since I have lost contact with most of the running contingent I felt obligated to provide reassurance that I would be there. I had no plans on staying for very long as I wanted to stop by my youngest stepson’s (Ian) baseball game to catch the final innings and then head to Walmart to stock up on supplies. I immediately sensed the typical buzz around the home that you would find at an ultra or any race for that matter. People were chatting about past races and about their future plans. I have become a bit more family oriented and realize that there are more important things to me than what I’ve done in the running world or what’s out there for me to do. I felt uncomfortable in that setting but despite that fact still stayed for a few minutes to chat with Phil Rosenstein before leaving.

I woke up the next morning at 4:50 a.m. with the stark realization that I would most likely be out there all day without the support of my family. My youngest had a ballgame that would last most of the morning and into the afternoon and then my wife planned to spend the afternoon with the oldest. I was disappointed but I told myself I’ll be okay, I’ve done it many times before. There were still some scars from the growing pains that occurred earlier in the week so I figured the time away was probably needed to heal. Before leaving my wife kissed me on the cheek and wished me luck and off I went into the dark early morning alone.

I arrived at Carl’s house about fifteen minutes before the start of the race scrambling to get my things in order. In my haste I missed the group photo that was taken just prior to the start but at this point it seemed inconsequential. Shortly after placing my drop bag in the appropriate place the group was given the go ahead to start.

I had no real objective other than finishing but when the pace at the start seemed alarmingly slow I decided to run at my own leisure as opposed to restricting my gait. A couple of hundred yards into the run I took the lead and never once looked back the entire way to finish wire to wire in that same position. I can say that I didn’t want to win or I didn’t try to win but in fact I’m a competitor and though my only purpose was to finish once I got a taste of the lead it would not be so easy for me to relinquish it. There were several strong runners in the group led my recent Badwater finisher Keith Straw and defending Delaware 100 champion Jessi Kennedy. Truth is I have no idea what their objective was during this run but I was left to assume their appearance meant they were there to give it their all. That being said when I took the early lead I felt certain that as the run progressed I would be challenged and maybe even passed more than once. Those thoughts in fact had an affect on my own performance through eighteen miles as I wasted a lot of energy worrying about who was going to pass me first.

I was very familiar with the entire course including the first road section leading out to the trail. I ran an easy pace that left me feeling very comfortable until I reached the short cutoff trail around mile 3 that would lead me back to the road. It was pitch black and I didn’t have a light so I had to tip toe around the rocks and up the short hill making sure to exit the trail where directed. It was a bit tricky but I managed to pull it off without incident. We would retrace our steps on this same road section four times later in the evening after completing the four trail loops. The thought of having to travel these rolling roads multiple times is something that could have taken a toll on me mentally had I focused on it but I didn’t. Instead I just continued to move consistently toward the trail head.

When I arrived at the aid station I was greeted by two volunteers one of which I recognized as Mary Vish from New Jersey. I didn’t chat with her much on this meeting but did take the opportunity to talk to her the next time around. I felt bad for her because she was fighting injury and felt that by volunteering she would feel apart of the ultrarunning community. I thought about what she said for one second and responded back it doesn’t matter if you never run again you will always be a part of the ultrarunning community if you so desire. You don’t have to run, you don’t have to prove yourself, you are a person and because of that alone you belong.

I left on the first loop fully aware of where I was and where I was going and how long I needed to take to get there. I had home field advantage and planned to use it to my benefit. The course has a little bit of everything but it is generally single track on soft trails. If forced to provide a comparison I would say it is quite similar to what you might see at the Bull Run Run 50 with some gently rolling hills, some rocky, rooty sections of trail along with two uncomplicated water crossings.

It’s very important for the runners to stay alert in this particular run because they encounter civilization more often than they would in most races of this nature. Besides the fifty eight miles traveled completely on roads there is also a major road crossing that occurs eight times during the trail portion of the run.

Personally I broke the trail portion of the run into three sections, Middle Run trail (six miles), Judge Morris Trail (three and a half miles), Lenape trail (two miles). That along with three short jaunts through cornfields is what I consider to be the make-up of the Delaware 100.

My strategy was to run the first loop in entirety and then incorporate some walk breaks during the remaining loops. As I mentioned before I felt sluggish early in the run due to some negative thinking but I recognized that pattern early enough to reverse the pattern and limit the effects. My ability to have reasonable expectations from my body relieved internal pressure which in turn provided energy. I’m a big believer that negative thinking along with unreasonable expectations use needed energy stores for purposes other than running. In this type of grueling event every bit of energy needs to be utilized for the right reason.

After reversing my thought pattern I experienced no other problems until well into the race. I stayed focused, limited outside influences, zoned in on the goal and because of that there was no pain whatsoever or at least nothing that I really felt until the next day.

I got off of the trail around 2:30 p.m. first stopping to refuel with energy drinks, soda and pickle juice. The pickle juice restored my sodium stores that I lost through sweating and urinating. I learned through running long distances that it is very important to stay aware of how I am feeling and respond when needed. Being able to change my energy level because of this response is very rewarding when I succeed.

It was a long trip back to Carl’s home where I would begin the first of four ten and a half mile out and backs on the road. The sun beat down on me and weakened my body. I slowed dramatically but never wavered because I know how quickly things can change. I had only a few more hours of sunlight to deal with before the cool dark skies took over. Experience is the key in these types of events. Knowing what to expect and never worrying about the present realizing the race is long and things will change is critical to success.

Carl greeted me back at his house around 4 p.m. at which time I showed my first sign of weakness. I admitted to him that I had no business being in the lead. The thought of telling him this never really occurred until he made mention of the fact that Jessi Kennedy was less than thirty minutes behind. I was certainly tired but in reality what I was probably trying to do was justify why she passed me before she actually did it.

I knew it was going to happen, she was going to pass me, then Keith would pass me, then Phil would pass me and so on. My mind was abuzz and once again I was allowing it to take over, sucking precious energy away from where it should be.

Carl told me to sit and relax for a few moments but I got my butt up and took off immediately. I ran from his house but then walked up a short hill and continued walking a while further in order to regroup. I was tired and I couldn’t figure out why but I just plugged away. In the distance I could see Jessi making her way toward Carl’s home probably about two miles behind me. I picked up the pace and ran by her trying to look strong but deep down I was spent. I never expected to be in the lead and it wasn’t my goal but as it became evident that I would lose the lead it took some wind out of my sails.

The turning point of my run occurred at mile sixty when I considered stopping for a few hours to take a nap. Then all of a sudden it happened, my wife sent me a text message to tell me that she and the kids were on their way to see me. I smiled, my spirits lifted and I began to move again with a purpose. They were the main reason that I was even there and now I would have the chance to share my experience with them. Angela sent me a few more text messages to gain a better idea of my location before we actually met on Linden Hill Road or about three and a half miles from Carl’s home. It was a quick meeting but it provided the encouragement that I so desperately needed at the time. The boys faces were a sight for sore eyes and their smiles opened my heart. While I usually narrow my world down to the path I’m running I opened the door this time and let my family in and it was a beautiful thing.

I met them once again on the next loop at the bottom of the same road going back to Carl’s home. This time Kyle, the older boy, brought me a Red Bull, while Ian, the youngest, was bouncing in place ready to run by my side. My wife just smiled still a little unsure as to why I felt it necessary to do this type of thing, but still encouraged me. It was kind of dark when we met but the road was well lit so I agreed to let the boys run with me for awhile. Kyle joined with us for about an eighth of a mile but exited when his mom greeted us at the next intersection. Ian, on the other hand, wanted to stay with me for a while longer. He is the most energetic, competitive eight year old that I have ever met in my life and it was a joy to have him by my side. If he was a few years older I would have let him stick with me the rest of the way and something tells me he would have done just that. That experience was enough to lift me to the finish and was the number one highlight of my run.

Once Ian departed I made my way through the off road trail section that led the runners off the main highway and onto a less traveled back road. It was here that I was greeted by my friend, Rick Palmer, with whom I haven’t spoke to in several months. He made a valiant attempt to start the race himself but was set back by a stress fracture in his leg. Despite the pain he was unselfish enough to pace myself and Keith Straw for several miles during the run. He is, in fact, the only runner to have started each and every Delaware 100 including his own version in 2006 when the race was canceled.

Rick led me back to Carl’s home where we were once again greeted by my family. I felt a little conflicted because I wanted to get in and out of the garage as soon as possible but at the same time I wanted my family to know that I appreciated their presence. My wife is the most precious person alive to me and my step children mean the world to me. I did what I thought was best and took care of my needs while at the same time kept asking my wife if she was okay. She probably thought I was nuts but it was the only way that I could think of at the time to help her to understand that I cared.

I left with Rick and would not see my Angela and the kids again until the next day. I left feeling pretty strong but my plan was to continue the same pattern I incorporated each of the two previous loops where I started off running and then walked periodically. This same strategy got me through each of the out and backs by running from telephone pole to telephone pole and then walking from telephone pole to telephone pole. I had the strength to run but my attention span was short which forced me to think about how tough it would be to run. These thoughts, in turn, would not allow me to run for long periods of time. The consistent short stints worked well as they got me from point A to point B quickly enough. I continued this method until I met my next closest competitor, Keith Straw, on the final out and back. I saw him in the distance as he was coming up Linden Hill road when I was going down. He was about three miles from finishing his third out and back and I was three miles out on my final when he all but conceded victory. He reached out to shake my hand and when I touched his frozen fingers I realized why he conceded. Nighttime had fallen and soon we would all become victims of the darkness and the cold air provided by the sunless sky. I still felt energized when I left Keith but soon after raising the hill I became complacent and started to walk myself. Not having Keith to push me I had nothing to do but finish. I walked with enough authority to stave off the cold monster but not enough to say I wasn’t in a death march. I drug my butt out and back walking every inch of the way until I met up with Keith once again about two and a half miles from he finish. He, again, shook my hand and congratulated me. He told me he took a break and was now ready to walk it in himself and suggested that I do the same. We parted ways and I walked a little further before walk/running down the final hill toward the suburban area where Carl resides.

I walked the final road sections toward the finish meeting up with 4^th place and first time hundred mile finisher Charlie Nelson and Phil Rosenstein both of whom congratulated me. Once Carl’s home was in sight I put it back into gear and for the third time became the first finisher of the Delaware 100 this time in 21:16.

While I will never say never I have do not have plans nor do I have a desire to ever run in a 100 mile race ever again. The experiences have been wonderful, thought provoking, and educational. I am very happy that I ran what I consider to be my last 100 mile race in my home state of Delaware supported by my wife, Angela, and my step sons, Kyle and Ian.

If I could leave this sport with one hope it would be that healthy people understand that running distances are only impossible if you allow them to be impossible. Any highly motivated person with an understanding family can run 100 miles. I know no one who has successfully completed this distance to be a superhero or superhuman in any way. It is a personal achievement and an accomplishment that I will always cherish but in no way do I believe it makes me any more special than anyone else on this planet. Those who have done it be humble those who have not and want to stick with it, work hard and you will accomplish your goal. Keep in mind that no matter what you do you have an impact on others.

Congrats to all those who attempted the Delaware 100.

Dave Bursler

Bear, Delaware